Short Story: The Holy Matrimony

by Martins Toritseju

She was beaming with joy, her smiles enchanting.

The bride’s white gown boasted its radiance. Intoxicating! It was finally happening. It was like a wish come true.

Victoria smiled again. It was her wedding day. She was perfect. He was perfect. Everything was perfect.

She was veiled but she could see Victor. He was so handsome in that tux. They both stood at the altar, the guests’ captivated eyes affixed.

“…for richer for poorer till death do you part?” the officiating minister came to the big finish.

“I do.”

“You may kiss the bride”.

Victor unveiled his bride and gave her a quick kiss. And everyone clapped and cheered.

That was it. They were married.

The reception followed with elegance and glamour but with a little too much of decency. There was much dancing, drinking and presents. It felt like the day wouldn’t come to an end but it did, sooner than expected.


The newlyweds let themselves into the bedroom. They sat on the bed next to each other, the smiles that once lit their faces slowly fading away. They have been preoccupied with the ceremony that they had completely forgotten this was also part of the package — their first night together as a couple.

They fell into an awkward silence.

“Did you see the way your aunt was dancing at the reception? It was hilarious!” Victor blabbed out, trying to establish a form of ease.

“Yeah,” Victoria mouthed and smiled a little as the memory came back again.

“Well, I will go wash up first. Then you can do so after,” Victor said and stood up.

Obviously his approach wasn’t working.


So Victor went into the bathroom while Victoria slid into the bed.


The couple were nervous. It was their first night together as a couple. Unlike many newlyweds, they dreaded it. Because it was going to be their first time, ever! And, worse, they had no concrete knowledge on how it goes down.

With exception to the occasional holding of hands, and two or three hugs, one of which is accounted for when Victor had proposed marriage, they had never been intimate before, not with themselves nor with any other person.

They’ve been uptight since the first strand of pubic hair emerged. In fact, they just had their first kiss on the altar. They both grew up in very religious christian homes where virtues, values and customs were hoisted in high esteem.

Victoria was more uptight even. She wouldn’t even allow a boy hold her hand nor touch her whatsoever. She was exceptionally ignorant of the games of two in bed. She was a literature student, with dreams of being a motivational and gospel writer. But she wasn’t a fan of literature that projects any form of immorality.

In her secondary school days, she was alien to some biology topics and pornography. She didn’t give listening ears to any of such discussion amongst her peers. So she really had no experience. She wasn’t corrupt.

Victor, almost the same way, had never dated or got intimate with girls. He had vowed to focus on his studies and not have any female companion (girlfriend) till his educational pursuit was completed and he was settled and ready for marriage.

And he’d stayed true to this pledge. When he was ready, he prayed earnestly and his heart was matched with that of Victoria. He, too, didn’t incline himself to intimate discussions common with his peers. Neither did he indulge in watching pornography or viewing nudity.

He knew nothing much of the female body parts. He, too, was clean and tried to maintain holiness at all times.

Whether to call their lack of knowledge with respect to their current situation a repercussion, Victor didn’t know. He walked out of the bathroom now changed into simple nightwear and Victoria took her turn into the bathroom.

They have been in deep thought ever since Victor had stepped into the bathroom. How were they going to work it out tonight?

Victor wondered why this wasn’t like those PG movies where immediately after the entry into the bedroom of a couple, they found themselves waking up in the next scene with the impression that they had consummated their marriage.

But this wasn’t the case, they may be stalling but they can’t skip it. The show must go on. So he decided not to give it any more deeper thoughts as he could already hear his heartbeat rise with each panicking thought.

He tried to calm his breathing so as to relax his taut nerves and bring down his heartbeat. He would just follow the flow of the night.

Victoria too had decided in her heart to allow Victor lead and just try to allow him do to her whatever pleases him. She came out of the bathroom also in her nightwear and went to lay next to her husband.

“I’m ready,” she muttered.

Victor flicked off the light and drew his bride closer. They started kissing and then followed some amount of touching. The pleasure was new and overwhelming for both of hem but they couldn’t afford to stop because they were enjoying it.


It was time for the main event. Victor had not seen any form of pornography or any experience to draw approach or knowledge from. So he decided to adopt that from something similar which he was familiar with — “animal mating”.

He had seen cocks chase after hens and mount (mate) them countless times. There was the occasional mating of street goats, houseflies (gosh he had even witnessed a couple of threesome among houseflies) and a few accounts of crossed dogs and even documentaries.

Different animals but the same approach — the female always faced down and the male mount her back and gave it to her. And which Victor inferred was the typical or general approach.

So he turned Victoria over, mounted her back and went for her anus!

Victoria could feel there was something wrong with this method but what did she know? So she let it be. Every come-back was painful. Well, she had occasionally heard that s*x was painful. She thought this was the logical explanation. But she couldn’t help but wonder why so many of her peers then were crazy about it when it hurts like this.

Victor on the other hand remembered one or two Nollywood movies he had watched while growing up when Nollywood movies had not gone X-rated.These misleading scenes were not that obvious. The actor was shown squeezing his face as if wherever his ‘thang’ was at that point was scissoring it.

And this was just the same look on Victor’s face. So he was misled to believe he evidently was on track.

Some minutes later, he came to a big finish and both fell silence to catch their breath and allow sleep snatch them away.

Victor smiled. He had had s*x with his wife. They had both lost their virginity to each other. Or so he thought. Little did he now, only one person had lost their virginity that night and in a bad way might I add, if it even counts, and it was him.

His wife, on the other hand, was still a virgin even after the many intimate nights that followed in their marital life. They kept on with their style, thinking that was really it.


One year passed and Victor and Victoria found themselves at their pastor’s office.

“Pastor, it’s already one year since we got married but no issue. We’ve been trying really hard but no pregnancy.”

“We want to have kids. We never for once led a reckless life. But why is it that we haven’t gotten any issue? Has the Lord forsaken us?”

“My dear, don’t lose hope. Those who lose hope will continue to mope. We are going to embark on a 3-day dry fasting exercise,” the pastor informed them.

“…If I be a man of God, then before the end of three months, you surely must get pregnant!”

If only the ignorant pastor knew exactly what was going on in this couple’s bedroom, why they had not really been able to have any issue, he wouldn’t have been too eager to stake the genuineness of his pastoral call on their situation.

Well, the three of them (including the pastor) embarked on the 3-day fasting and after its completion, the couple fired off their usual way.

Victor rampaged his wife’s anus every day, morning and night, now so much that she soon found herself having whitish feces.

But 6 months passed and no pregnancy!


Victor felt he was infertile. Low sperm count perhaps? He found himself slowly backsliding. He seldom attended church services. He kept bad company with friends who lived and still lead reckless life after marriage. He took to the habit of taking alcohol. He felt forsaken. So why bother to maintain holiness when his reward is an unfruitful marriage. His friends beg to differ. He wasn’t the problem, they’ll say. But he didn’t see it that way.

One day, he found himself a little early to the bar after work. His friends hadn’t shown yet. He needed a drink badly. He couldn’t wait for them to show up so he helped himself with a few bottles. Then came along Cynthia. She’d been flirting with him for the past two weeks. This time, she dressed more provocatively than ever.

‘What the hell’, he shrugged.

And he soon found himself in a room upstairs getting undressed with Cynthia. They dropped on the bed, kissing and caressing. And as usual, Victor made his signature move: he turned her over and launched full assault on her anus!

‘Wow, this uptight and decent looking guy even do anal?’ She thought as she twitched and moaned.

Then he pulled out and laid on the bed, trying to catch his breath. She was still expecting him to come back for the main thing when he asked, “how was it?”

“What? That was it?” she asked, surprised.

“Em, yes?”

“Is this how you’ve been doing it with your wife?”


“Oh! You poor thing.” Cynthia shook her head with pity.

She reached to him and showed him how to really do it. Cynthia was an expert. She was barely fifteen when she had her first. Ever since, she had done it countless times, with countless guys and different styles. The next few minutes followed with so much pleasure than Victor had ever felt. He finally found out what he had been doing wrong.


That night, Victor got home and took his wife to bed. She was about to turn and give him her back when he stopped her.

“I’ve learnt something new that we are going to try.”

And finally that night, after about two years of marriage, Victoria lost her virginity and soon became pregnant.

Victor was so grateful for his little rendezvous with Cynthia, but he repented of his backsliding and turned back to living a faithful life.


Six months later, the doorbell rang. Victoria stepped out to the veranda with her big belly to see who it was. It was a lady also with a big belly like hers.

“Yes? How may I help you?”

“Please, I’m looking for Victor,” the lady answered.

“Honey, who is it?” Victor asked as he stepped out too.

“C-Cynthia? What are you doing here?” he asked.

“I’ve been looking for you.”

“But why?”

“Can’t you see? I’m pregnant for you Victor!” she announced

“What?!” Victoria exclaimed.

Then she remembered Victor’s words that night.

“I’ve learnt something new that we are going to try.”

The poor woman dropped to the couch in tears.


Martins Toritseju is COO and story writer at

Follow Martins on Twitter @martinswrites

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