by Cindy Bufford
I don’t have any kids but I’m happy.
When I was young and married, the choice wasn’t mine to make.
My husband’s low sperm count made the decision. As it happened, he changed jobs (got out of the putty factory), fooled around and got the secretary knocked up.
I was bitter for a while and then decided I would see what I could do on my own.
I never played with dolls when I was young, and it seemed the maternal instinct I had in my twenties just faded out.
I eventually had a tubal ligation, so I didn’t have to deal with all the health issues of birth control. I was busy living my life and finding fulfillment in so many other things.
I was a bit on the wild side in my youth and the joke in the family is, “If you had a kid she would probably be out of jail by now.”
I am lucky I’ve always had some great kids in my life. As a matter of fact, my best friend for nearly 50 years is the sister of my cheating ex-husband.
I was with her when her 2 boys were born, and they have always been a proud part of my life. I used to be the proverbial crazy Aunt Cindy but now I’ve grown up and matured to the eccentric Grand Ma.
At this stage of my life I sometimes wonder what it would be like to have a kid that might come around and be loving and interested in how I’m getting along.
I am sometimes curious if this person would have my love of animals, would they recycle, would they always use their turn signal?
I don’t believe I have “missed out” by not having kids because I didn’t live my life with any regret.
One hard fact about not having kids is that I have a lot more money in my retirement.
It takes a lot to grow up a kid and it doesn’t stop when they turn 18.
Look at all that bail money I saved.
Of course, in my heart my kid would be a great scientist or maybe even the President of the United States, but last I checked, the imagined don’t always turn real.
***
My name is Cindy Bufford.
I grew up, got married, got divorced.
Then I worked in the nearly all-male timber industry until the spotted owl changed my path.
As a dislocated timber worker, I went to college at 45 and traded leather gloves and sawdust for the latex gloves of a dental hygienist covered with blood and pus.
I retired with most of my fingers and relocated from Oregon evergreen trees to Tennessee where trees get naked in the winter.
I love my retirement and am passionate about nature and animals.
Life enchants me!
