What does Detty December mean to you?

1

by Gloria Ezeh





Detty December is all about the shows and concerts and the parties.

Detty December is a way to cool off after the stress of the year. No wearing of chunky suits and strangling yourself with ropy ties, Detty December is time to finally go loose and catch mad fun.


This is when your friends come in handy — they keep you updated on all the concerts and shows and weddings and all.


Detty December!!!



But will everyone be partying and attending all the shows this December?


Probably not.


This is a list of people likely not joining the Detty December train this year:


1. Broke People


Broke people like me will not be going anywhere this December. See how broke people think:


Imagine buying a ticket to Future Live in Lagos for 25K, that’s enough for one bag of rice plus one live chicken for Christmas and one jar of groundnut oil.


Broke people have a Ph.D. in Home Economics.


Once you are broke, you will suddenly not be interested in the artistes. Cardi B in Lagos? The broke person will be like: That spoilt girl? Abeg I’m not interested.


Party Santa: I got free tickets for two.


Broke Person: Really? Let me see.


Party Santa: Here are they. I thought you’d be going but didn’t know you don’t like Cardi B. Will give the ticket out to someone else.


Broke Person: It’s not really that I don’t like her like that. Just give me the ticket. I will manage and go!


DJs own Detty December!!



2. Introvert People


See those fancy introvert people that will never step out of their house unless Chimamanda Adichie has released a new book and they are heading to the bookstore to buy a copy, Detty December is not for them. If you like give them free tickets and even come to the house to come and carry them, they are not going anywhere.


An introvert looking confused at a Detty December hangout



3. The good children with mean parents


Life is worse for this group. They want to go out but their parents have made the rule: No going out!


They will stay at home and sulk the night away. Some very talented ones will get very creative. Before Mama realized the body sleeping on the bed is just a well-arranged pillow form, they have jumped fence and comot!


What does Detty December mean to you?


I will be very honest here. I may be broke but being broke has never stopped me from having a Detty December. With all the overpriced concert tickets flying around, a lot of people do not know that there are FREE shows sandwiched in between. Just this year alone, I have seen Burna Boy, Jidenna, Tecno and Davido without spending a dime.


Before the month runs out, I would have seen them all. There is even a wedding coming up soon where Tiwa Savage will be performing.


Say what again about being broke and not having a Detty December?


Me and all my girls ready to turn up at all the free shows this December



When does Detty December start and end?

The standard start time of Detty December is December 1 and the end date is January 4, when people return to their respective offices.


But the good thing is that depending on your budget and schedule, you can start anytime you feel right for you. Some people do not get into the groove until late into December (combining Detty December with Christmas to form Detty Christmas).


***


Gloria Ezeh is a senior editor at DNB Stories.


She is the writer of the best-selling Tales From Gloria.

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